My story story is about a call I ran on. I was in Paramedic clinicals and working full time in BLS transport. With the stress of class and work and clinicals things added up. 0230 responding to a gun shot wound. As a student the trauma calls are always the exciting ones.
As I hop in the back and we fly to the scene and PD clears scene. We hope out and run straight to the patient with the wife and brother crying and screaming for us to save him. We grabbed is almost lifeless body placed him on the stretcher and loaded him.
Gun shot to the neck. Doors shut. A fire fighter assists. Patient immediately goes into cardiac arrest. I begin on compressions while the lead Medic prepares to intubate. With each compression blood spurting through the hole in his neck and blood ran through this mouth. With eyes staring back at me.
Our unit did not have a Lucas automatic CPR device it was up us. 10 minutes on scene and about 20 for transport. CPR throughout the whole call. Exhausted and praying he makes it, the ER Doc calls time of death. Covered in blood and sweat.
We were defeated. We lost. Hard work for nothing. I still see his soulless eyes and hear his wife screaming. I still remember the blisters from my watch and seat belts rubbing against Each other. It was our last call of the night. I got home and cried and slept for hours.
I thank God my parents are my support system. It took about a week for the nightmares to stop. But I vented and spoke about them. And then I had another critical call where we saved them. And I remember why we do this job. To help those in need. ” who will go for us. Here am I, Send Me.” Isiah 6:8 I’ve had other horrible calls but when you make a difference those goes away.
Fight the good fight and stay strong. Other people need our help.
– Story written by J Larrea, EMTB/Medic Student in Houston, TX. 2+ years in EMS.